Conversation with Lucy
Lucy: My friend says girls can do anything boys can do and I agree. There is no difference between boys and girls, we are both as good as each other.
Mum: I think you need to think about that for a second. Are you exactly the same as a boy?
Lucy: Well sure, boys have a penis and girls have a vagina - but apart from that, we’re pretty much the same. We are all humans. We both can think and reason, we are different from the other plants and animals. So surely that makes us the same as boys.
Mum: Let’s start with that basic biology - boys have a penis, girls have a vagina. That is not the same! We are biologically different. Boys are often taller and stronger. But they can’t have the babies - only females can do that, and that exact difference helps explain the difference between males and females.
We need to work together - a female needs a male to have a baby. But the female carries the baby and the male cannot. We have equal parts in it, but we are not the same. We have a different role but we are still all humans. We complement each other.
Lucy: Oh you mean we say nice things about each other - we’re supportive?
Mum: Well actually there are two different words which sound the same but mean something pretty different.
Compl-i-ment - this one means saying something nice about someone else - what I think about you! “You’re looking pretty good today” or "Wow you’re clever!” They are some examples.
Compl-e-ment - this word is more connected to the word complete - it means working together to show the finished idea/picture
Lucy: That just seems confusing having two words that are so similar.
Mum: Let me try to explain it a different way…think about bacon and eggs for breakfast. They are yummy on their own, but they work really well together to make the other complete. Or how about pencil and paper…What can you do with a pencil only? You can use it as a bookmark, you can try to write with it on the ground or surfaces, you can use it to tap and drum or make sounds with. What can you do with a piece of paper by itself?
Lucy: You can make paper airplanes!
Mum: And?
Lucy: You can scrunch it in a ball, you can fold it to make things - like origami boxes and creatures, you can make a fan
Mum: So you can do lots of cool things with each item all on their own. But when you use them together they work in the way that they are designed. The pencil is best used to create images and texts, and the best way for the pencil’s creativity to be seen is by using the paper. They have different roles and functions but they work well together. They compl-e-ment each other. Now imagine and you are the pencil and Johnny is the paper. You are both really important, you can both do lots of fun stuff, you even can do some of the same things, but you work best together. You compl-e-ment each other.
The Bible talks about men and women in the same way. We are all people created by God. He loves us all and he sent his son to die for us all. In the Bible, in the book of Galatians it says,
There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. (Galatians 3:28)
We are all important to God, he loves us all no matter what our role in society, and no matter whether we are male or female.
And at the same time, in the Bible, God shows us that we are not the same. In Genesis, the very first book in the Bible, when God talks about how he made the world, it says three things:
1. We are made male and female. Genesis 1:27 says,
So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.
It is really clear, people are made in God’s image, and part of that is that we are male and female, we are made different, and even in our differences we are both in the image of God, and God says it is very good.
2. We are given a task together, which is to have a family, and be in charge of the rest of creation. Let’s look at Genesis 1: 28,
God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it.
Be fruitful and increase, that means have children, and then subdue the earth. That means we are to manage everything in the world, the rest of creation. And most important of all is that we do it together.
3. God made everything good, but he made the man first and it wasn’t good for him to be alone. Genesis 2, helps us understand more of God’s creation. In Genesis 2:18 it says,
The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper corresponding to him.”
So after looking at all the other creatures that he had made, God saw that there was nothing in creation that was right for the man and so he created the woman out of the man, to be a helper that was equal to him and like him, but different to him. That is women are created just right to compl-e-ment men. Men could not do what God wanted on their own and so God created women. We are to work together as part of God’s creation. We are to compl-e-ment each other. We need each other.
Lucy: Hang on! Girls are meant to be helpers!?! That doesn’t sound like we are equal at all. That sounds like we are less important than boys. I am not sure I like that.
Mum: I don’t like the sound of that either, Lucy! It sounds pretty tricky doesn’t it? But the thing to remember is that A helper is still equal to the other person. If you could see that Johnny was having trouble drawing a horse for his school project, and because you’re such a good artist you gave him some help – would that mean you were more important than him? No! It just means that one person can’t do everything on their own, and they often need someone else to jump in and ‘give them a hand’.
I’m sure at school your teacher often helps you. That means she is your helper. And in the Bible, do you know who is described as ‘the helper’ most of the time? It’s God. He has to help us because we can’t do everything for ourselves.
But whether one person is ‘the helper’, and the other person is the one being helped, we are still equally valuable people. But the number one thing to remember is that we are all made in the image of God and we are all one in Christ Jesus. God loves us all, Jesus came to die for us all, so we can all be in a relationship with God, whether we are male or female. But we are not all the same - we are equally loved, and also different. Like the paper and pencil - males and females are not the same, they can do different things but we work best together. We compl-e-ment each other.
Beth is married to Chris, and together they have 8 children ranging in age from 26 to 10. She has spent most of her life in the west of Sydney - mainly the inner west, where she grew up and worked in ministry with her husband, before they moved together to minister in the greater west! As well as partnering with her husband at Grace West Anglican, Beth works as a primary music teacher and is passionate about teaching kids about Jesus.